dari awal aku tahu, it won’t work
what was i expect? nothing
aku tahu kok, sadar. we will not work on each other. diawal aku buka mata, tahu motifnya, berharap sadar. everything seems sweet at first. the way he treated, the way he look.
sort of, i figure everything out. we are not gonna make this out too far,
yang salah pun tetap aku. aku memanipulasi kesadaran otakku. after i asked him. “emang kita ini apa?”. i know he cannot reply that question. dia mandang ke atas, aku tahu pikirannya tak bersama raganya saat itu. dia terlihat memikirkan kemungkinan, make sure of his feeling. if he was sure, he can reply that immediately, but he was take long time to figure it out. me in my mind. ok. i know whats going on.
lalu dia oun mulai menghilang, step by step. and lost of my sight. never text me first. never share what on his mind,
occasionally, he texted me. i knew. he just bored. thats all. aku hargai dia, i give him my time, i care of him. we met. we sang a lot
att the moment he was nice.
after that time, he refuses. he said how pity i am. and think that too, how pity i was. i figure it out again. he doesn`t care at all. so i persue myself. i should. i should care about me. how i worth.
yesterday, he said. we cannot going this well. oke. i reply. he said sorry. i dodnt say sorry too. ok well i`ll figure this out. rather than cry myself overnight, i exshauting myself to sleep. i woke up at 21. and try sleep again at 22．no, i am not okay. even when i write this. but sure, i`ll be okay
